How does one do that exactly?
I was going through the bank drive-thru, and as I was trying to deposit my newly acquired, much appreciated and much needed Christmas money, I fumbled and dropped the canister on the ground. It then rolled into the next lane and started to make its way down the slight hill.
I started to freak out - I can’t afford to lose that money! But I couldn’t open my door to reach it because there wasn’t room due to the narrow lanes.
So I moved my car up, while hoping the canister would stop rolling and no cars would drive through that lane. I opened my door, but apparently in my haste, I forgot to put my car in park.
My little gray civic started to take off on its own, and my body was halfway out with the door wide open. I floundered to hit the brake as I simultaneously tried to stop the car with my left foot, Fred Flintstone style.
I saw that the brick wall that separates the lanes was impending and my door was still open and I couldn’t seem to get my left leg back in. I completely panicked and was screaming like a crazy person.
I finally hit the brake as I closed my door enough so that I didn’t pull a Tommy Boy and lose the door.
I still can’t believe I scratched it only slightly.
It happened in a flash, but I’m thankful I mostly kept my wits about me. (Aside from trying to drag my foot on the ground to stop a moving car.)
Although I did hurt my hip, I consider myself to be incredibly lucky. I could have run myself over, my car could have driven itself into traffic - hurting someone before crashing and costing far more to repair than that was in the getaway canister. I can’t stop thinking about the awful possibilities, even though it makes my heart rate increase.
My friend Brett laughed and said he wanted to see the security film, which gives me all sorts of anxiety. What if my bank submits the footage to some show where Tom Bergeron provides the goofy commentary? That would be horrifying.
I wasn’t even sure I was going to tell anyone, but I texted a few friends and here I am telling the whole Internet.
My best friend Elena told me not to be embarrassed and said, “Think of it as a success. Fate had you scheduled to lose your legs today and you said, ‘Fuck you, fate. I got this.’”
And before you ask: yes, I was able to recoup my money.